Thursday, December 31, 2009

the progression of my time with the cunt coloring book

clever: amazon actually sells a children's coloring book full of cunts














comedy: amazon's "users also liked" section of cunt coloring book links to "gash photography". which is not pictures of cunts but a wedding photo service that apparently never attended junior high or understood the concept of words having more than one meaning.

hope for the future: the kindle version


also: those 4chan dudes have too much influence


ALSO: the colored cunt and ophrah in the same post was purely coincidental not racism. oprah's great.

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Saturday, December 26, 2009

Wednesday, December 23, 2009

:| face

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Chalf and Meredith

this post is dedicated to the interactions between those two that I recently witnessed:

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new euphemism watch

"Reid refused to answer any questions about the upcoming conference, joking that he plans to go back to Searchlight, Nev., 'and frankly, I'm just going to sit back and watch my rabbits eat my cactus.'"

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Tuesday, December 22, 2009

Monday, December 21, 2009

mike baiting

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Saturday, December 19, 2009

peup

http://stewdio.org/pong/

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Friday, December 18, 2009

i need to see this

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where im frum

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Wednesday, December 16, 2009

genius, sheer genius

this is the best thing I've seen all day, and i've been awake a long fucking time:



via the stranger

also, have you all tried that "next blog" button up at the top? I spent the past half hour there and found mostly religion blogs. what's the deal? google tryin'a convert me? don't they know I'm gettin baha'iiiiiiiii?

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Monday, December 14, 2009

constructivism

Does anyone else think it's silly/cute that articles about Esperanto stress that it's a constructed/fake/artificial language?

or that there's people dedicated to celebrating the construction (as opposed to evolution, duh) of languages?

or that those people (called conlagists--CONstructed LAnGuage IST {get it?!? it's like they follow some grammatical rules, but not other ones})have their own flag with a tower of babel on it?

or that according to these people there is a distinction between just ordinary constructed languages and languages constructed for artistic purposes (called glossopoeia, thanks JRR Tolkein!!)

Brought to you by google's celebrating LL Zamenhof, and wikipedia--of course.

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merry christmas



i want to play.

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interesting/random wiki find

check out this list of kids of clergymembers:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/List_of_children_of_clergy
There are some surprising ones (Nietzsche? Jung? Alice Cooper? maybe that's not surprising) and some weird trends (what's with all the singers?)

I originally got here looking up the article for "PK" (Preacher's kid) which--due to excluding a couple religions-has a shorter, more concise list:
http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Preacher's_kid

Why was I looking up PK you ask? Well.....

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Friday, December 11, 2009

McSweeneys is sometimes hilarious

I AM LOCKING THE WIKIPEDIA ARTICLE ON OUR SEX LIFE.

BY ALAN TROTTER

Dear Josie,

After repeated instances of vandalism and abuse, I have taken the step of locking the Wikipedia article on our sex life. Although I have previously banned both your user account and your home IP address, malicious edits have continued, both anonymously and from newly registered users "alanequalswanker" and "ooohImabigimportantadmin."

I know that's you, Josie.

Neutral point of view is a fundamental principle of Wikipedia, and no one with a neutral perspective could claim that, over the six months during which we were engaged in a sexual relationship, my performance was "lackluster," "uninspired," or "noob-ish" (or, indeed, "noobian"). Nor could the physical intimacy we shared—which at the time you clearly found extremely satisfying—be objectively described as "unsettling [like] watching the films of David Lynch in a car without a working handbrake while parked near the edge of a cliff."

As a result of edits like these, I have been made to repeatedly revert the article to previous versions, where, you might remember, you described the physical act of love between us as "better than [you] imagined [possible]," "really sweet," and "well-intentioned."

Locking the article has also become necessary to prevent the constant reinsertion of a section with the heading "Like a Cowardly Slug That's Just Spotted a Pile of Salt," detailing at length the uncharacteristically unsatisfying night we shared in a Paris hotel last summer. As I made clear several times on the talk page of our sex life, that was a completely unrepresentative occasion and is therefore excluded from the article on the basis of a lack of notability.

I'm sorry that it has been necessary for this article to become one of only a handful of fully protected articles editable only by administrators, but Wikipedia is a serious and worthy endeavor, which you have repeatedly attempted to compromise by means of proxy IP addresses, puppet user accounts, and your bitch friend Carol. This juvenile behavior is unworthy of such a noble project.

Also, the article on "Your Vagina" now redirects to "Your Lonely, Aging Vagina."

All the best,
Alan (admin)

via McSweeneys: http://www.mcsweeneys.net/2009/12/10trotter.html

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these ads are absurd

and, umm, kinda hot. But the New York Times says the science is bunk...

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Thursday, December 10, 2009

atheist jokes

robby, you are an enigma

But on a serious note, I googled the phrase "why did the atheist cross the road" and this was the most popular result:
Q: Why did the atheist cross the road?
A: He thought there was a sidewalk on the other side, but he wouldn't believe it until he tested his hypothesis

That's retarded. Atheists aren't defined by staunch positivism. If they are atheists, the road should probably represent a more interesting challenge than "what's over there?" Perhaps the road could represent death or a boundary around a sacred place. Meredith, make a joke that is better than this utter shit.

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whoops

:(

lol

:)

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the magic of devlin



also, scar wars:

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Wednesday, December 9, 2009

you guys are all sooo fukt

I used to rock at pokemon. ur screwed.

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Monday, December 7, 2009

that's just the way she goes

stick with it, it's kind of genius

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especially funny

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WANT

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Dick In Ass

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Saturday, December 5, 2009

derp

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Thursday, December 3, 2009

Wednesday, December 2, 2009

ya mon

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mom!, r2d2 is in star trek

found these while watching both films frame by frame




the second one is a little more questionable
Source:
http://movies.yahoo.com/feature/buzz-log-r2-d2-star-trek.html
http://gizmodo.com/5386296/r2+d2-caught-in-transformers-2

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Break time!

As much as I despise long lists of stupid one-liners that get forwarded around, I have thought all of these things at some point in my life:
-Have you ever been walking down the street and realized that you're going in the complete opposite direction of where you are supposed to be going? But instead of just turning a 180 and walking back in the direction from which you came, you have to first do something like check your watch or phone or make a grand arm gesture and mutter to yourself to ensure that no one in the surrounding area thinks you're crazy by randomly switching directions on the sidewalk.
- 80% of the people in the "people you may know" feature on Facebook are people that I do know, but I deliberately choose not to be friends with
- How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?
- I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.
- A recent study has shown that playing beer pong contributes to the spread of mono and the flu. Yeah, if you suck at it.
- How many times is it appropriate to say "What?" before you just nod and smile because you still didn't hear what they said?
- I love the sense of camaraderie when an entire line of cars teams up to prevent a jerk from cutting in at the front.
-There's no worse feeling than that millisecond you're sure you are going to die after leaning your chair back a little too far.
- I find it hard to believe there are actually people who get in the shower first and THEN turn on the water.
-Sometimes I'll look down at my watch 3 consecutive times and still not know what time it is.
-Even if I knew your social security number, I wouldn't know what do to with it.
-I wonder if cops ever get pissed off at the fact that everyone they drive behind obeys the speed limit.

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Tuesday, December 1, 2009

Robby is a douche


Also, he totally didn't want to have a foursome this weekend. wuss.

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spencer will love











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heh

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oops

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WTF

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precious 2

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Po-po-poker biscuit

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BISCUIT!

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singin in the deathstar

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agua

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Meredith will love

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Bohemian Gonzo

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precious!

by sapphire

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I'm at the exploding pizza hut

I'm at the exploding taco bell.

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